Skanky Boys

Ah. It's been way too fucking long since my last entry. Did you miss me?

A couple of years back, I had a predilection for older men. It made perfect sense: I was 21...why would I want anyone younger than I am except maybe to play PlayStation?! As a young man, I was fascinated and smitten by (older) men in corporate suits, looking dignified, focused, matured, and being so like a "Daddy" to me. At 22, I was dating men whose ages ranged from 29 to 37. And growing older, I still never paid attention to younger men.

Now, however, just a couple of months away from the big three-zero, I am officially the older man that young boys flirt with...and thought of as their, uh, Daddy.

At the recent Circuit Asia party in Roxas Boulevard, about five boys ranging from 20 to 24 exchanged numbers with and hit on me. The only consolation I got was, when I asked them to guess my age, nobody guessed beyond 27. Perhaps I should just lie about that! Ha-ha!

But I am allergic to boys. Or at least now I am...again. Why? Aaahh...so many of them young skanky boys fucked me up in more ways than one...and one of my friends got victimized, too.

Carlos Harvey was boy number 1. He was 22, I was 28. He was officially my very first younger boyfriend. I met him through a common friend in Laguna (where we both live), and then later on via Connexion. He wasn't exactly good-looking, but he was funny, sweet, gentle, and, well, had the requisite boyish charms. One week later, we were exclusively dating...and fucking each other like dogs in heat. That's the one thing I miss about being young: having stamina, drive and libido that don't seem to run on empty. CH had that. We'd go at it anywhere and anytime. By bedtime, I was exhausted as hell. At the very least, I was thankful Viagra was never a necessity...just yet.

'Twas alright with CH...until his being a young boy started manifesting. He made no concrete, let alone realistic, plans in life. He was always late. He showed no remorse for any wrongdoings. He had no consideration for other people's time and schedules. He'd never do things unless he's told to do so. Every fight we'd have, he was too quick to throw in the towel and call it quits...while I would always negotiate and run after him. He'd still go to the gay chatroom despite our agreement that he shouldn't anymore. Later on, he'd go shower and bring his mobile phone inside with him, as if hiding something. With all these, I kept my composure, and was forgiving. But the last straw for me was when he left the country to go on a diving trip, and did not even give me a fucking call to say that he was on his way. Me, his fucking boyfriend. So much disregard for, at the very least, propriety. I broke up with the bastard. Last I checked, he was fucking my ex...that is, the one that he knew full well was the one that messed up my life. How's that for no dignity and courtesy? Boys.

Boy number 2 was Jeffrey. I met him online (the site of which escapes me at the mo') and decided to meet up the same night. I was meeting up with a date already, but he insisted that if I finished early, that we should have a night cap. I said I was going to try. But since date number one turned out to be a flop, I decided to see him right after. He was 23, I was 29. That same night, he was in my pad sucking the living hell out of me. Everything was fine and dandy. Kept seeing him since, and undecidedly considered dating him exclusively. What I found out later on was a knockout.

Turned out, Jeffrey still had a boyfriend as he was dating me. No wonder when we're on a date and his phone would ring, he'd always excuse himself saying that it was his mother calling from China. The idiot trusting guy that I was, I never questioned him. And then I found out later. And what's worse was his boyfriend happens to be my friend! You can just imagine my (and the boyfriend's!) consternation upon this information. When I warned him that I was going to leave him because of this deception, he broke up with his boyfriend. I was still resolute on leaving. I was crushed: being deceived and unknowingly deceiving my friend at the same time! I talked to my friend right away and asked for his forgiveness, saying that I had no idea that the boyfriend that we barely discussed, and MY new to-be boyfriend are one and the same. He told me that I should just take Jeffrey, considering he was going to be out of the country anyway. Again, I was still resolute about leaving. But being the older guy, ergo being compassionate aka gullible, that I was, Jeffrey's tears and constant begging for forgiveness made me reconsider. He became my boyfriend soonafter he proved his supposed devotion. Supposed devotion being the operative word.

Being six years apart, there was obviously an age and/or generation gap. Somewhere down the road, I felt bored. There was really nothing deep, worthwile, hell, ADULT, that we could talk about. Because of this, I decided to talk to him. But because I couldn't go at the time we scheduled to, I had to raincheck for the other day. And so I thought everything was ok...until the next day. I sent him an email telling him about this...only to give him an idea for when we talk that night. I didn't expect him to respond because that was just a 411. He replied barely an hour later...with false assumptions, accusations, and far-off claims. Needless to say, he split up with me via email. How tacky was that? That very same evening, a friend of mine told me that he saw Jeffrey cruising at Guys4Men the very night that we were supposed to talk...and was telling people that morning that we already broke up...when we still haven't! And, to compound this discovery, I was told that he would frequent Club Government on weekends when he was supposedly at home sleeping...without him even telling me! Skanky, skanky, skanky.
I moved on the next day. I totally did not deserve a skanky boyfriend.

But these two boys' "crimes" were nothing compared to Joni, my friend Franco's boyfriend.
Franco was 39, and Joni was 24. Coming from a convention in Boracay, Franco came home to a big surprise in his pad: his boyfriend naked and getting jiggy with another man. In his fucking condo. Using his fucking a/c. Playing his fucking dvd player with men-to-men video. On his fucking bed. And Joni didn't even have a key to Franco's apartment.

Franco, when I found him in his apartment, 30 minutes after he called me, was shaking and drenched with sweat and tears. He later on found out, through Joni's confession, that it wasn't the first time he did it in Franco's apartment. And at a certain point, he even conceded to doing a sex video in the very same room where Franco caught him being given a blowjob by another man. Franco was devastated. But who the fuck wouldn't be?! I probably would have killed the two bastards. For crying out loud, Franco took care of Joni. He fed him, bought him expensive stuff, gave him all the sex that he wanted, made him feel special, and protected him from ridicule and harm. And this was the thanks that he got. This is the proverbial biting of the hand that fed him. How despicable.

What is wrong with today's generation? In bath houses, chat rooms, clubs, and skanky places, these boys are the ones that dominate the scene. You'd even be surprised that they know the trade well. These CHILDREN seemingly have no sense of dignity or decorum. It's sex, and fun, and being made to feel that they are beautiful...never mind the deceptions, the dirt, the lies, and the irreverence.

Do not get me wrong. I am not pretending to be prudish or saintly. I--and a majority of the "oldies"--had my share of skank...but within bounds! And it was never a game where I didn't give a shit what came out of it. What is happening now is just...despicable.

Yes, do challenge my stance...but I am going to tell you that although this is tantamount to a generalization, the "good boys" are more the exception rather than the rule. Trust me on this.